From the District of Mission & Animal Control:

'Dear Mrs. Abercrombie,

Please be advised that a medium sized white boxer with black markings blocked the path and confronted the mail carrier at the entrance to your cul de sac and as a result, several homes on Finch Terrace did not recieve mail delivery last week.

In view of the threat posed by your dog, your mail will be held in general delivery until we recieve written notice of the measures you will be taking to control your animal...'


Dear District of Mission & Animal Control,

All that i expect in my mailbox is overdue credit card bills I'm hiding from my husband and a mammogram cancer screeing notice. I will not be taking any measures to control my animal.
... Bite me...